Is forgiveness possible?

It was a simple prayer meeting.
I opened my mouth to talk to God.
What came out of my mouth shocked me.
I was praying for the captors at the Westgate Mall.
I asked God for mercy upon their lives.
I asked God to forgive them.
Before I knew it I was forgiving them.
The more I said, "I forgive them,"
The more my heavy heart softened.
I began to pray with urgency
About the situation.
That it had to come to an end.

I was angry at the captors.

I was angry that they cared less about life.

I was pained at the fear on the children's faces.
I was pained knowing there was rape going on.
I was bitter at how they had casually ended lives.
My heart was in conflict:
Feelings within: fear, anger, rage, bitterness.
Faith within: forgive, forgive, forgive.
I could not even cry;
I was torn between me and the words in my heart.
Yet I knew I needed to do it.

The more I let go of the unknown captors,
The more my heart felt lighter,
To pray without any hindrance.
At that moment I realized,
I serve the Lord God Almighty
Who asks that we forgive those who trespass against us.
I had borne resentment and suspicion in my heart
I actually had hatred in my heart
Yet for the past two days I had claimed I loved my Savior.

Is forgiveness possible?
Many people will have many things to say.
Each one entitled to his or her opinion.
Yet as I stood in that simple prayer meet
The truth about the Christian faith hit me.
Forgiveness is possible
Not in my own strength though.
Forgiveness is possible
By the love and grace of God.
He asks us to love and forgive our enemies.

What kind of God is this? 
We may ask? 
He is the God Who loves mankind
He is the God Who forgives us 
Each time we transgress against Him
And ask Him to forgive us.
He is the same God
Who teaches that we forgive others
Just as He has forgiven us.
He is the God
Who forgives everyone 
Irrespective of race, color and creed
As long as we come to Him 
And ask for His forgiveness.

What kind of God is this?
He is just.
He is forgiving.
He is loving.
He is also the One Who avenges for us.
In letting go of those who have wronged us
He gives us the opportunity 
To be free in our hearts.
Free from the pain and anguish
That comes with unforgiveness.
Free from the bitterness
That grows into a wound
Deep withing us 
Paralyzing us and hindering us from being who we are.

As we count our losses and mourn,
Forgiveness is far from our hearts.
Forgiveness seems like an easy way out.
Forgiveness seems cowardly.
Yet we do need to understand
That forgiveness frees us from our enemies,
Making us light enough to heal,
Creating in us the love needed
To take the next steps.
In our healing process
We need to come to that place:
It is called Forgiveness.

* A tribute to all who were affected by the Westgate Mall tragedy. In writing this I acknowledge that forgiveness is not easy and it will not come in an instant but my sincere prayer is that God, the Author of Forgiveness, would by His Holy Spirit, mend our broken hearts and crushed spirits, and give us the strength to soar above the pain, the wounds, the anguish, the frustration, the fear, the anger, and everything else in order to experience the liberty that comes with forgiveness. 

We are a bleeding nation but we are not alone - our wounds shall be healed, one day at a time, one journey at a time, but we must forgive ourselves and the captors; only then shall true healing liberate us to soar on wings like eagles once again.