Heaven's Drizzle

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There was a slight drizzle as I made my way to the beach on Saturday morning. I could not stop the tears from rolling down my face as I walked the ocean’s breadth. There was a deep sense of awe about God the Creator and God the Father. My life flashed before me and I was humbled at His never-ending and unconditional love for me. I let my tears freely flow; I did not care about the man who jogged slowly past me; I did not notice the two ladies who stood at the edge of the water; I really did not care that I had no handkerchief or tissue to wipe away the tears on my face; all I cared about is the deep gratitude I felt in my heart towards God. 

As I sat on an unfinished stone foundation by the beach, I lay bare my heart to God, and once again I could feel the fear, the doubt, the anxiety, the insecurities, etc begin to creep into my heart. I had so many unanswered questions; questions I had carried within my heart over the past five years. I had been tossed and lashed by storms and I knew my heart was hurting, longing for compassion, for understanding, for love, and most importantly for answers. In that very moment the words of Isaiah 43:18-19 came to mind: “Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland.” Hmmm … the words were familiar … why did I not just trust His Word? Was I focusing so much on the past that I could not see where He was leading me? I wondered. 

I sat across him under the open skies and laid bare my heart. With each question he asked, snippets of my life story were shared, in the presence of God. The more questions he asked, the closer he got to the core of who I really was: the quiet weak girl who longs to be held in a real tight and warm hug and be told that all will be well. I poured out my soul and instead of judgment and condemnation, I felt enveloped by the warmth and love of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. In that instant I knew that the session had been orchestrated by God. As he held my hand in his and prayed with me, I knew that all the years I had spent in tears had not been in vain.

There was a slight drizzle that fell on us as we prayed that Sunday evening.

“Beautiful rain,” he said.

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